And
then, one day they wake up, and they are all grown up.
I
don’t mean grown up as an adult just yet, still a two-year old, still my little
guy, but definitely different this morning. Definitely…more grown up is the
only way I can explain it. More synapses firing? Connecting neurons to be
activated more often? A certain way he smiled this morning? That extra shine
and glimmer in his eye? You know that “wink of his eye and a twist of his head”
that St. Nicholas had that made you know you have nothing to dread? THAT.
I
can’t explain it, but when the sounds of “Mama? Mama? Mama! Mama?” brought me upstairs this morning,
the face I saw was a happy older, grown up face with a smile so wide it was as
if he was willing me body and soul to scream “Let’s go!” and attack the day.
My
little guy. Every day is my favorite day. But TODAY, today was my favorite day
by far. People sometimes ask, what is your favorite moment about being a
parent? Some parents like the baby years, the toddler years, or maybe the more
young-adult years suit them better. I think our friend said it best when he
said, “Every day is my favorite day.”
It’s
true. Every day is new. Every day is fun and exciting and you can watch them
grow and learn and become who they are going to become. But in the happiest of
happy ways, it is in some ways so morbid because every day is also one more day
you don’t get back. One more day in the books. One more day until you have no
more days. Ah...until you have no more days.
So
my answer will always be TODAY. Today is my favorite day.
I
will not complain about horrible days. I will not call them horrible. I will
accept them and take them in stride and fight for a better day tomorrow. It can
always be worse. This is what I signed up for. I signed up for all of it no questions
asked. We grew a human life. He has his own mind, his own body and his own
path. I will love him and support him and help him when he wants it and watch
him forge his own trail…and maybe eat his soggy French fries when he says he’s
all done with them.
I
watched Grant today for the first time very purposely not sit in the cart at
the store. He wanted to walk. He was very adamant about helping me push the cart around the store.
He immediately starts pulling things off the shelves and putting things in the
cart, telling me we need this and that. This is purple so it goes in the cart.
This one has a picture of a sun on it so it goes in the cart. Random things all
throughout the store. Then we get to the sparkling water that we drink, and
right away he grabs a 12-pack of it, says “Dadda” (because I say the water is
for Dad) and struggles to lift it up and put it in the bottom of the cart. He does not once look in my direction for help or approval. He then returns to his position and continues
to push the cart down the aisle. Today I was merely a spectator on my own
shopping trip.
In
the diaper aisle, he picked out his box of day and night diapers that we use and
after trying to pick them up, looked at me and pointed at the box “Mama?” I picked them up and put them in the cart and he looks at me with great purpose and gives me the sign language sign for "thank you." We
have been talking to him about being a big brother and how there is a baby in
my tummy, but I’m not always sure if it makes sense to him or not. It is a hard
concept to understand. I was proven wrong again when we walked by the baby
clothes and Grant pointed to some pajamas. I told him they were too small for
him and that they were made for a baby. After hearing this, he says “bebe”,
grabs the pajamas off the rack, puts them in the cart, and points to my tummy “bebe”,
and off he goes down the aisle again. I had to struggle not to be the crying smiling
pregnant woman in Target at this point, nevermind that I was being told what to do by a 2 yr old.
At
our lunch place today that we’ve been to a few times before, he walked in the
door and instead of holding my hand or asking for “UP?”, he stood in line on
the carpet in front of me and waited his turn. We got to the front of the line
and I picked him up to see the lady at the counter and he proudly says “HI!”
When we are served, he ate his grilled cheese as if it was the best filet
mignon he’s ever had, all the while smiling and waving to those around him. It was a great day.
He’s
my little guy and he’s all grown up. Today. Today was definitely my favorite
day…until tomorrow.
Until next time, keep exploring!
Love and hugs,
M, K, G, T, O and G calls him, "bebe"
