Boy Oh Boy, We're Half-Way There!

Boy oh boy! We're at 20 weeks and found out we will be meeting our little BOY in December!

Yes, we found out the gender. We like to be prepared. While I have many a cute picture of his boy parts, I shall be refusing to post them here. I really can’t be that mom who puts up pictures of her son’s boy parts on the internet before he steps foot on this planet or feels the heat from the sun on his face. I will, however, share this picture the ultrasound tech took of our little guy flexing his muscles. His head is on the right, showing us his growing muscles.

Here he is with his hand to his forehead wondering how many more pictures we are going to take of him and how much longer the technician will be poking and prodding his nice comfy home.

I must say, knowing who will be arriving makes it all that much more real. We knew a baby was coming, but somehow knowing who is showing up snaps you into a reality. You feel like you are more prepared, but really, you’re not. You think you know what’s coming, but you don’t.  You can only pretend to know what’s around the corner, and then you’re pretending from past experiences, and how limited are those?

I will be the first to raise my hand and say I am a researcher by trade, theory, and lifestyle. I like to know what’s coming. I like to look things up.  I am a hunter, a gatherer of information. Both good and bad, I like to know about it. I like to know not what just should happen, but if this, then this, then that could happen.  If someone said to you, “Hey, look out, there is a unicorn and a bear around the corner,”
 I would still want to know more.  At first glance, most would be happy to see a unicorn and scared of a bear, but with more knowledge, more questions asked, you find out that the unicorn is 12 stories high and shooting laser beams out of his eyes, while the bear is really 12 inches tall and just wants to snuggle.

I have read through most of the books in the pregnancy section our library has to offer.  I have read my pregnancy books on my nightstand cover to cover, only to start at the beginning again and read just the week we are currently in. I own and have looked through the medical student textbook of Essentials of Human Embryology, which really is a guide with real pictures of everything that could go wrong both in and outside the womb.  But still, I read it.

And yet, one day, I hope to turn this all off and just let the world unfold before me without knowledge or expectations, and see what the world has to offer through the eyes of someone who has never seen it before. When we first heard the words “He’s a boy!” my thoughts were how fun this is going to be with mud and trucks and dinosaurs and baseball and bloody knees and Band-Aids and insects and riding bikes in the street.  Immediately after that, I thought…well shame on me.  I loved all those things when I was little and I definitely did not turn out to be a boy.  I have heard it many a time “you have all those boy qualities too, but you’re a girl”. Our little guy isn't even here yet to tell me what he likes or doesn't like, and I've already decided what he will enjoy.  Truly, if our little guy was to be a gal, we would be just as excited, just as happy to meet her, and I would still be excited for mud and dinosaurs and trucks. A fireman? A baker? A tailor? A doctor, lawyer, street sweeper, rocket scientist, baseball player, writer, composer, teacher, farmer, shoe designer, first person to write home from another planet?

I guess the moral of my rambling is that Kyle and I have been asked many a time already, are you hoping for a boy or a girl? Or do we think it is a boy or a girl? 

I've never had any inclination of who our little person could be.  I've only hoped for 10 fingers, 10 toes, insides on the inside and outsides on the outside.  Anything after that is a bonus. Kyle and I agreed a long time ago before we started on this adventure “You get what you get, and that’s what you get.” I have heard many times before, "you are only given what you can handle", and if that's the case, then look out world!  We are either ignorant enough or confident enough to think we can handle anything. We have to be. What other choice do we have but to handle it?  Having a baby is called reproduction, but really, you are producing something brand new. There is no “reproduce” about it. We took a little bit from me and a little bit from you, and create something totally new, something the world has never seen before.  Definitely something we have never seen before.  We are growing a human, a brand new life.  Something that wasn't there before is now there...existing, breathing.  

I would like to amend my answer to that question now. Are you hoping for a boy or a girl? 

      It doesn't matter. I hope for 10 fingers, 10 toes. Insides on the insides, outsides on the outside. I will do my best to be healthy, so the little one inside can be healthy.  I hope he grows up to be an outstanding human being, a good citizen of the world, and happy.  Above all else, happy.  And please remember to call your mother every now and then. I hear moms like that.

Until our next adventure, keep on smiling, snuggling, and smelling the world around you.

Big hugs,
Mandi, Kyle, Toby, and the little guy